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Three Letters and Six Etiquettes of Chinese Marriage

A traditional and genuine Chinese marriage should follow a basic principle of the “Three Letters and Six Etiquettes” in the past. Even now some customs are still followed. The “Three Letters” include the Betrothal Letter, Gift Letter and Wedding Letter. The Betrothal Letter is the formal document of the engagement. The gift letter would be given to the identified girl’s family. Within the letter will be a list of the types and quantity of gifts designated for the wedding. Once both parties accept the marriage, the Wedding letter is prepared and presented to the bride’s family on the day of the wedding and is a document that confirmed and commemorated the formal acceptance of the bride into the bridegroom’s family, with some adaptations of course. The six etiquettes include the proposal. It is done by the matchmaker. The 2nd one is the birthday matching. The matchmaker will ask for the girl’s birthday and birth-hour to assure the compatibility of the potential bride and bridegroom. The 3rd step is to present the betrothal gifts. And then the man should present the wedding gifts. The 5th step is for both of the parties to pick a wedding date. Then it is the final and the most interesting step: the wedding ceremony.

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